Chris Caffery (TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA, ex-SAVATAGE) has issued the following festive update:

"Merry Christmas my friends. I am going to title this post 'Why don't u smile?' I am sitting right now at home, a fire lit...my family here, my cat by my side. I am very happy. Extremely tired, but very happy. So, why ask why don't you smile? A fan or ex fan as they described in an email asked me this question via email a couple weeks ago. It has really weighed heavily on my mind since. It was while I was in Ottawa just before Thanksgiving that I had an extremely bad reaction to shellfish. This was the first I had ever known of my allergy. Strange symptoms hit me...itchy hands and feet, swelling all over inside and out. I felt a strange sensation of impending doom. All of a sudden I had a seizure and my body shut down. I fainted. Luckily I woke up, however, covered in blood after I fell face first into my hotel desk. I truly believe I am surrounded by angels and for sure they helped me get back up. I had slightly broken the cartilage in my nose, my eye was cut open, my teeth had cut through through my lower lip. I was really banged up. I was rushed to the hospital and was stitched up, but I was pretty much a mess. The next four or five show days I performed in a lot of pain and quite bruised. I did manage to cover the bruises, but my lips and mouth were pretty swollen. They still are. It was impossible for me to even formulate a smile at all. I refused to miss a show because I just don't. I remember playing a festival with Savatage in 2001 where I ripped an IV needle from my arm and ran from a hospital in Holland. My kidneys shut down from food poisoning, but I could not miss the show. I don't like missing shows! I knew I wasn't going to be 100% but I had to perform. I was so frustrated on this present tour because I knew my ability to interact with the audience was going to be affected. But i was happy to just be alive and be onstage! I wanted so badly to smile but I could not. Then came the email…'why don't you smile?' The basic evaluation by this person was that I was so spoiled and going through the motions that I just didn't care to. That after all these years I have had that I didn't feel the crowd was worth it. That everyone else in the band obviously was more happy to be there than myself and I disappointed him and his adoring son. That I was 'just a spoiled rock star that obviously didn't care anymore.'

I just want to say that I am lucky to be alive right now. By all the signs of what happened in Ottawa I actually may have died for a minute. I was on the stage that day when this person wrote this mail in tears because I was just happy to be alive. I did my best to be there for my band and the fans. I played dizzy through the pain for quite a few shows. I performed to the best of my abilities. If you want to know why I didn't smile, I'm sorry...it was because I couldn't. I physically didn't have the ability to. My stitches and swollen face could not even show my teeth. My friends, I didn't smile because I couldn't. That is the only reason I would never smile onstage. I never even wanted to let people know what happened, but I felt the need to after the harshness of the email I received. Just in case anyone else felt the same way. However, I also have thought about this situation and decided that maybe I can help someone in the future. Food allergies are very dangerous. If you even have a slight reaction to something please go to an allergist. If you get a serious reaction immediately call 9-11...trust me...it is not something to take lightly. The anaphylactic episode happens very quickly. You may feel you have time to react but the worst hits like a brick and within seconds. I have had a tendency to feel bullet proof and this shot me down instantly. Once again to anyone who saw me in this period of time when I was healing, if your question was "why don't you smile?" it was because I actually could not... I sit here now at home, alive and thankful for that. Thankful for many things. But one thing is for sure...I am very blessed. Blessed because of my life. Blessed because of all of you and blessed because i know tomorrow morning I will wake with my family and spend at least some time home for Christmas. FYI, I am smiling. Merry Christmas, peace and goodnight."